Monstrous Souls by Rebecca Kelly

Author:Rebecca Kelly [Kelly, Rebecca]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Agora Books
Published: 2020-06-24T16:00:00+00:00

It’s barely midday when I reach home. Discarding my coat and shoes, I slump on the sofa. I know I should ring Denise, but, first, I retrieve the envelope of photographs and the notebook.

There is something deeply disturbing about the notebook’s cover, scattered with ladybirds and their curling antennae. My mother had bought two, one for me and one to give to Nina as a gift. Mine had been full of my childish activities, accounts of what I had done with Nina and at school. And all the while, Nina was filling hers with the dark, terrifying truth about her life. It is cool in my hands. I switch on a lamp and am aware that my fingers are sitting in the imprint of hers.

I open the cover and inside, beneath the words This Book Belongs To, she has written her name in biro — Nina Carpenter. The N and the C have been double drawn and beneath that a flower, long stemmed and leafed. The ink is faded and patchy. Trying to prise apart the following pages is not possible, and I lay it down with a sigh.

Cleo whines round me, and it is only with great effort that I get up and feed her. Afterwards, sensing my alien mood, she runs through the cat flap and into the rain.

My phone is full of messages from Danielle, Jason, and Denise, but I ignore them all. I am remembering again the day Nina told me that she was abused by Ken. I recall her pain and the burden of trust she gave to me. And, as though I am a vinyl record, stuck forever on a scratched groove, the image of her as she passed me the picture of Maria replays over and over in my brain. It’s not my responses I remember, but the dual emotions that flickered in her black eyes, the thin triumph of proof weighted against despair. Not even the memory of telling her that I would run away with her softens my heartache. I recall how soft her cheek was against mine and the smell of cigarettes on her breath and in her hair.

I must ring Denise and Jason, and I try to imagine Jason’s reaction. He will want to see the photos, the proof of the men who abused her. But what would those images do to him?

I glance down at the packet of photos still exuding the smell of damp. I unwrap them, my mind resisting looking again, but I must do it. Hidden amongst those figures might be the one who took Anna, who killed Nina. I shiver as I open them, half afraid of the memories that might be spilt from me. It isn’t easy; I have to hold back my reactions to what is there. As I scan the faces of the men, apart from Ken, none elicits a memory; but there, on the back, Nina has labelled them — Ken, Ray, Brandon — the list goes on. Halfway through, I have to place them down and swallow the rush of horror.

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